


In A Child's Eyes

by Blumstein



Category: Kagerou Project
Genre: Gen, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Time Loop
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-28
Packaged: 2021-03-14 18:35:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28550250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blumstein/pseuds/Blumstein
Summary: Shintaro Kisaragi expected to regain his memories on the summer of his 17th year, two years after Ayano's death. It was a reasonable assumption. The day Ene forced him outside with a broken keyboard was the catalyst for change in most timelines, he observed.Or that was supposed to be the case.Standing in front of the mirror, a 10-year-old boy greets his gaze. Raven hair, unkempt appearance, and blood red eyes were prominent features of the child. He raised a hand and rests it on the glass surface; the reflection mimicked his actions."...I hate life," Shintaro sighed rather loudly. Of all things, why did he have to live as a kid again?
Relationships: Kisaragi Momo & Kisaragi Shintaro, Kisaragi Shintaro & Everyone
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	In A Child's Eyes

There were times when Shintaro Kisaragi dreamt of a life that wasn't supposed to be his. Of visions and sensations that a child could never conjure.

He could see vague shapes and splotches of color on the worse days. When he was particularly upset or sad on a given time, his dreams would take on an abstract form.

Red, he found, was analogous to fiery emotions. An odd combination of dread, fear, and longing accompanied the color. Once, he saw a silhouette with an article of red strings draped around their neck. It waved on the air as if gravity was nonexistent--or, he mused, as if it had a life on its own.

Blue, he felt, was of irritation and fondness. Though it was surprising for Shintaro--he read an article on Color Psychology and Blue was not supposed to be the way he envisioned it--those spikes of contradictory emotions were usually followed by an emptiness he could never describe. On such times when Blue was the majority of what he saw, muffled voices tease his curiosity, just at the edge of his hearing range. He could never decipher what they spoke of, but the sensations often left him waking on the wrong side of the bed.

Orange, he thought, was an odd color to fixate on since the prior two were Primary colors, and certainly not Tertiary ones. In fact he thought it would've been more logical to see Violet, since, duh. Red plus Blue begets Violet. But he hadn't conscious control of his own dreams, hence Orange became the harbinger of regret and pride and a familiar warmth that he instinctually knows lingers with him on the waking world, but in his subconscious this knowledge is lost.

Sometimes these abstract dreams were a mixture of colors, shapes, smell, and intent. It was not as simple as only seeing or feeling or smelling; as time passed on, the dimensions of his subconscious escapades elevated into an incorporation of different senses. Tangy dollops of mint preceded a flickering presence of some sort. The scent of worn pages and soft sunlight affirmed his predilection to azure objects.

On better days Shintaro could see snapshots of people and events. Sometimes a still frame, other times a reel playing between seconds to minutes of footage.

He discovered early on that these were memories of a different time, rather than a figment of his own imagination. First, he's never seen these people before. Though very few details stand out, those that do indicate that their ages were between 13 at least and early 20s at most. He was never acquainted with people of that age range before, aside from one or two relatives from his father's side. Shintaro was sure he'd never seen them before in passing; he was already well-acquainted with them at this point of time.

Second, he remembered conversations with words he never understood yet. They were between his 'dream self' and the people-he-had-yet-to-meet, of spoken topics and hidden meanings his young mind had yet to decipher. What slivers he remembered on his awakening, Shintaro searched for in dictionaries and grade school level textbooks. These were resources his mother and father were all too happy to provide. He's had slow progress on this front, Shintaro thanking his luck for remembering came second nature to himself, and what little he learnt was of mundane conversations and the emotion he would later realize was fondness.

Third, the technology and background where these memories were in were more advanced than in the current period. Some of his dreams were spent in front of a sleek, flat-monitor desktop that was leagues better than the blocky computer present in his father's study. Shintaro of the future was also not without his 'smartphone': a sleek, rectangular device with softened edges that seemed to be the evolved form of flip phones every adult seemed to use. There he'd come into arguments with an impish lady that seemed to inhabit the device. It was weird, since she seemed like a 'virus', some sort of malicious digital being, even though the lady showed signs of human intellect.

But he digressed.

The point was, for two years now, he had dreamt of a life not his own.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been used to writing essays that stories come naturally short to me.
> 
> I know not when or how future me intends to release chapters, just that I have a vague idea on what to write. Any thoughts or ideas born from reading this likely trainwreck is appreciated.


End file.
